


paving the runway (you're gonna fly)

by confinesofpersonalknowledge



Series: Presents for Frens [7]
Category: Sanders Sides (Web Series)
Genre: Alternate Universe - Human, Angst, Car Accidents, Heavy Angst, Hospitals, Hurt No Comfort, Im sad bc i wrote this, Implied/Referenced Suicide, Like its not explicit suicide but like, M/M, Minor Character Death, More Suicide, No Happy Ending Fest, Past Character Death, Suicide, Suicide Attempt, This is, This is sad and heavy and really not good, You Know What Happened, it's really sad, its p clear, no betas we die like me, really sad, this doesn't have a happy ending
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2020-04-24
Updated: 2020-04-24
Packaged: 2021-03-02 01:00:58
Rating: Mature
Warnings: Major Character Death
Chapters: 1
Words: 1,251
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/23816560
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/confinesofpersonalknowledge/pseuds/confinesofpersonalknowledge
Summary: Roman King wanted a happy ending. He'd spent his entire life working for it, and when he had it, he was determined not to lose it. But that wasn't what the universe had planned. The universe stole everything from Roman King. Now, it's Roman's turn to say goodbye.
Relationships: Creativity | Roman "Princey" Sanders and His Daughter, Creativity | Roman "Princey" Sanders/Logic | Logan Sanders, Logic | Logan Sanders and His Daughter
Series: Presents for Frens [7]
Series URL: https://archiveofourown.org/series/1467886
Comments: 14
Kudos: 22





	paving the runway (you're gonna fly)

**Author's Note:**

> My friend sent me a song and an idea and I'm really sorry  
> The song is Paving the Runway (You're Gonna Fly) by JJ Heller  
> I wrote this at literally one am I'm sorry

Roman hummed softly. It was a pleasant day, sunny and warm outside, so Roman had decided that he and Logan were going to go out and take their daughter out with them. She was still so small, only four years old, a perfect beam of sunshine. Roman loved her, so, so much. She was practically his whole world – her and Logan, that is. They meant the world to Roman, more than the world. They were what gave Roman the strength to see each day after another, to wake up in the mornings and smile. They were what gave Roman to wake up and breathe, to settle into his skin comfortably.

He looked down at Skylar, smiling and kissing her forehead. “ _Go after your dreams… as crazy as they may seem… go chase all the stars in the sky… baby I’ll be paving the runway… ‘cause I know that one day you’re gonna fly…_ ” He smiled down at her, kissing her nose playfully, holding the little girl close and rocking her. She only giggled a bit, leaning her head on his shoulder, tired and sleepy.

Roman kept singing, rocking her as Logan joined them, exchanging a soft kiss between the two of them. Skylar’s breath evened out as she dozed off, a perfectly warm and sleepy weight in Roman’s arms as he leaned back into his husband’s hold and closed his eyes. “ _Darling, stand on my shoulders… up where it’s carefree… simple and good,,, baby, soon you’ll be older… you will reach higher than I ever could…_ ” 

He trailed off lightly, content.

.

Roman held the flower close to his chest, entering the empty park quietly. It was Skylar’s birthday, today, and he remembered just how his precious little girl adored red roses. If Roman could have, he would’ve bought her all the red roses in the world, to see the smile that would have lit up her face.

He’d bought them for her that night in the hospital too. He’d bought them and brought them, sitting next to his sweet little baby, holding her hand as she struggled to breathe. He’d only gone inside for five minutes, Logan outside watching the young girl as she played hopscotch in the pavement. Neither of them had seen the car coming. There wasn’t anything they could do, for their little girl. Nothing they could do to fix it.

_In the end, all she’d wanted was for Logan to hold her. For Roman to sing to her. So Roman had sung, tears dripping down his face as he brushed her hair out of her face. He took in deep heaving breaths, wiping at his face, wiping her tears out of her face. He leaned down and pressed a gentle kiss to her forehead, giving her a small smile._

_“Go after your dreams…” He started, sobbing. He managed to get through the song once, shoulders trembling with the force of his sobs as he watched Skylar’s eyes, holding her gaze for as long as he could. As he watched the light drain out of them. As he watched his little girl go to sleep…_

_“…’Cause I know that one day you’re gonna fly,” He whispered, leaning up and kissing Skylar’s forehead. As he pulled away, a doctor swooped in, far too late for the little girl. She was smiling as she leaned into Logan’s hold._

_At least she didn’t look like she was in pain. ___

__

__._ _

__

__After that, Roman gave up singing for a long, long time. After that, Roman and Logan gave up a lot of things. The loss of their daughter had shaken their lives, had shaken the two of them, shaken everything that had brought them together._ _

__Each night turned into a fight. Each fight turned into insults screamed at each other. Accusations that cut deep. Lines that were crossed. Words hurled at each other that neither of them could take back even if they wanted to._ _

__They broke each other’s hearts and came back to each other over and over to break them over again._ _

__And then, Logan didn’t want to take it anymore._ _

_Roman remembered the call. He remembered getting the call, remembered feeling resentful – wondering if it was Logan, calling to tell him he’d gotten a hotel room again for the night. Calling to tell him it would be another night Roman would spend alone, staring at a dinner that was going cold, staring at the attempt after attempt he made to salvage what they once had._

_He wondered if they would ever get to salvage their relationship. He really didn’t think they could. But he couldn’t leave Logan either – there was a part of him that still loved Logan, truly and honestly, in a way he couldn’t ever bring himself to forget. Logan had been part of Roman’s perfect world, his happy ending. Logan had been everything Roman had worked for._

_Sometimes he went to sleep, whispering, never singing, a sad little lullaby to himself over and over to stave off the lonely chill of the empty bed. Sometimes he slept on the couch, unable to stand the empty bed._

_He remembered getting the call, though. He remembered being in the kitchen, chopping onions and pretending his tears were just from the onions. Remembered the feeling of just… knowing, when he picked up and heard some unfamiliar voice. Remembered not even feeling surprised._

_He barely remembered making his way over to the police station. But he remembered how Logan looked out there, on the morgue bed. Remembered the way his face still looked handsome and sharp even with a hole in the center of it. Remembered thinking that it was the first time he remembered seeing Logan looking peaceful in the last few months since their daughter’s death._

_He remembered screaming._

__

__._ _

__

__Two years passed without Roman realizing. Two whole years, where Roman got their affairs into order. Two years, that Roman spent alone and grieving, trying to find some way to fix things. Trying to find some way to find their happy ending, to find his happy ending._ _

__He’d had it in the palm of his hand. He’d had it, had closed his fingers around it and pulled it to his chest, holding it close like he used to hold Skylar. He’d cradled it, given it everything, had emptied every last corner of his heart into it, hoping that it was his forever. Had even tentatively thought, after six years, that it could be theirs._ _

__He’d never imagined this._ _

__Roman took a deep breath, going down on his knees in front of two gravestones, setting the rose down on Skylar’s and brushing his fingers over their names. They were still his world, still his everything. Still his only reason to smile, though he never did much of that. Still the only reason he woke up in the mornings._ _

__He opened his mouth, and for the first time in years, began singing a lullaby, sitting in front of two little gravestones, tears dripping down his cheeks as he sang._ _

_Logan King, 1994-2020.  
Skylar King, 2015-2020._

Roman took a shaky breath as the song neared it’s end, hand fumbling in his coat pocket. “ _…if ever your wings… are tired and broken things… can’t see through the tears in your eyes… baby I’ll be paving the runway… ‘cause I know that one day you’re gonna fly…_ ” 

__The song sat in the air around them, a heavy weight pressing down onto Roman’s shoulders. He sobbed, leaning forward, cool metal touching his forehead._ _

__And then…_ _

_Bang!_

**Author's Note:**

> also i just got my bad things happen bingo today and one of the prompts was flashbacks so... here


End file.
